There is a huge backlog of things that I need to do in my personal life. A friend of mine has lost her loved one, and although she has been in my thoughts and I have cried feeling her loss,I haven't told her how I feel. Somehow it is difficult for me to express my thoughts and feelings in person and especially more so, when people are geographically far apart. I also haven't replied/spoken to a few other friends for quite some time though I have been meaning to, yet each time I sit down to write, I am at a loss of words.
I hope this is a temporary thought block and I wanted to at least make a start at amendments by updating this space. Arguably there is not much to update on the coffee front. But then sometimes I don't want to write about a cafe, I want to share a real coffee with a friend.
The last one I shared was in London (Le pain quotidien) with a few friends. And for a little while, I almost forgot how miserable it was outside. (One of those weekends where it rains non stop for the entire period!)
The rest of my free time (which has been rather rare) I have spent escaping from reality. And because I always come up with different ways to escape from reality, this time I chose to bake cakes. Now those few who know me, will know that working in the kitchen is not exactly my strong point. Yet sometimes doing something absolutely out of character helps me relax and even take my mind off the otherwise sinking feeling.
First on my list was the 'Date and Walnut cake'.
And then, the Three milk cake (or as the Mexican would say - Pastel de tres leches).
Both were amateur attempts at creating something which certain special people have made for me in the past. Both go very well indeed with some nice hot coffee on the side.
Finally, I guess there is only a limit to which one can try to escape from reality. Past has a way of catching up with the present. Sooner or later we have to deal with our own sense of loss and failure.
I have realised that moving on is not a switch, but a very slow process of distracting ourselves with temporary immediate achievements to be able to live with the permanent sense of loss.
Sell Coffee, not your soul
